mzmadmike (mzmadmike) wrote,
mzmadmike
mzmadmike

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BUY A GUN!

February 6th is Sarah Brady's birthday. I always celebrate by buying a gun. If the scrofulous troll wants me to stop buying guns, all she has to do is stop having birthdays.

The neat thing is, any gun works. Bolt action hunting rifles are secretly, "Highly accurate, telescopically sighted, military sniper assassin weapons" and the preferred choice of terrorists. Utility rifles are "Military style semiautomatic assault weapon of mass destruction Rambo killing machines" and the preferred choice of drug dealers. Cheap sidearms are "Saturday Night Specials" and the preferred choice of drug dealers. Expensive sidearms are "Military Assault Pistols" and are the preferred choice of mercenaries AND drug dealers (Got to love that!) Shotguns are used for "bloodsports" like putting food on the table, and are used for "gangland executions" of innocent recreationally medicated youths taking innocent strolls in your living room at 0300 with their tire iron, switchblade and Tec 9 collection.

BUY A GUN!

Then send a photo of yourself shooting it to Sarah Brady, along with a pack of smokes for her lung cancer--I believe she smokes Marlboros.

I got gifted with a lovely little no-brand .38S&W break top from the 1890s. It only fires low-pressure blackpowder loads with highly toxic pure lead bullets, has only enough power to wound someone into moaning, drooling, bleeding and shitting on your carpet in pain (until you put four more into their head up close), was the "preferred choice of criminals" in its day (As well as for cops, detectives, PIs and couriers), and because it was manufactured before 1899, it is legally not a firearm and can be legally sent through the mail should one of my friends develop a nasty problem like some Kerry voter stalking them.

Just wait until you see what I plan to do for her wake.
Tags: guns, politics
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